Guest Post by Lara Catone: Intimacy & Diastasis
This site is a modest and family-friendly site that specializes in a little known issue called diastasis recti that can make the two sides of your abs feel as if they’re in separate zip codes. It’s an injury to the core that leads to other “hush-hush” issues that are often considered immodest to even mention. But, sweet ladies, it’s time to mention them… but I’m already blushing just with this little paragraph {because I know what’s coming} so I’ve asked Lara Catone, an expert in the area of intimacy and pelvic floor as they relate to diastasis to write this post for me. There are no pictures, no explicit language, just straightforward talk about the things no one wants to talk about. There is no judgement, just healing available if you need it.
Lara writes… As a yoga teacher, doula and somatic sexologist I help women process their births and the subsequent changes in their bodies and relationships. I often say that I help women put their bodies back together after birth. My area of specialty and great passion is the core which includes the muscles of the abdominals, low back, pelvic floor and diaphragm. Most women come to me initially for weakness and the change of appearance in their abdominals due to diastasis recti. They want to lose their mummy tummy! In our first meeting it quickly unfolds that diastasis is affecting numerous areas of their lives including, and often especially, intimacy.
Diastasis recti is a common condition seen in postpartum women where connective
tissue in the abdominal muscles, the linea alba, thins and spreads out causing the
abdominal muscles to separate. This separation in the rectus abdominis can cause a
bulging tummy, umbilical hernia, back pain, postural problems and pelvic floor
weakness. Women who have diastasis recti describe an overall feeling of
disconnection from their center.
CHECK YOUR BELLY FOR A DIASTASIS BY CLICKING HERE!
Our core, is our very center–as the name implies–and when the core is out of alignment
or weak it can throw us off in a multitude of ways. As a yoga teacher and somatic
sexologist I look at the physical, emotional and energetic components that come into
play for women who have diastasis. Each of these different layers can interfere with
intimacy.
New parenthood in and of itself is an adjustment for couples. The lack of sleep, the
newness of the bond they find with their baby, the demands of taking care of that baby
24/7, financial stress and hormonal changes are all well known ingredients in
extinguishing the romantic fire for both men and women. Here, I would like to explore
specifically how diastasis might add strain to your love life through each layer; physical,
emotional and energetic.
Physical - Women who have diastasis are often in pain or discomfort. Their backs and
shoulders ache, they may have pelvic pain. There can be a feeling of discomfort in the
abdomen itself. It doesn’t matter how you slice it, pain is not sexy.
Women with diastasis also have a feeling that their bodies don’t work the same way and
that they don’t have the same amount of strength and feeling of togetherness, or full
body integrity that they were previously used to. Their bellies can be bulging and
bloated. A common phrase I hear is, “This doesn’t feel like my body.”
Lastly in the physical realm, diastasis can contribute to pelvic floor weakness which can
lead to incontinence and organ prolapse (when organs like the bladder or uterus fall out
of place and start to hang into the vagina).
Emotional - We know that negative body image is an issue that almost universally
impacts every American woman at some point in her life. The postpartum period is
certainly no different and can be a real challenge for women’s self esteem. In fact,
muscles carry, or hold, emotions and certain muscles are associated with specific
emotions. The emotion most connected with the rectus abdominis (the abdominal
muscles that separate with a diastasis) is self esteem.
Women feel so much pressure to obtain a certain, unobtainable body image that
pervades all areas of our culture where real pregnant and postpartum bodies are not
recognized. When women are feeling ashamed of their bodies because of how they
look or feel, they don’t want them to be seen and they often don’t feel like they deserve
to be loved, honored and cherished with their imperfections.
Energetic - Just like emotions, the body also has energetic qualities that have been
part of ancient eastern philosophy for centuries and are now being recognized by
modern science. In yogic philosophy the sexual center is in the core. The area below
the navel that holds our womb and organs of reproduction also holds the energy of
creativity, wealth, fertility, sensuality and sexuality.
When a woman is not feeling physically or emotionally connected to her core, she is
unplugged from her libido. She is missing out on the magic of her desire, passion and
sensuality.
The good news is that there are specific exercises to heal diastasis and there is also a
process of self acceptance and self love that can heal the emotional wounds. Through
reconnecting to the core physically, emotionally and energetically women can start to
feel full again and get their mojo back.
Read what Bethany wrote for Lara’s site! Click!
As a woman who has never given birth, I am humbled by the stories that so many
women have shared with me about their births and postpartum recovery experiences. I
feel blessed to hold space for the processing of these great rites of passage and to
support women on this journey. {I love how she’s so open about her own history}
Lara Catone is an emerging leader in the field of sexual wellness. As a yoga teacher
and somatic sexologist with a specialty in women’s health, her mission is to empower
radiant health and pleasure. In 2011 she began development of the Restore Your Core
program that includes nonsurgical approaches to diastasis recti (abdominal separation)
and pelvic pain and dysfunction. Lara trains fitness, birth and medical professionals in
her progressive approach to core health. She has a thriving private practice in Venice,
CA and teaches workshops and retreats worldwide. If you need further insight and help with your own intimate issues, Lara recently expanded her global
community through the launch of an online studio with live webcam classes.
Disclaimer: This is not a sponsored post. No moneys were exchanged for the writing of this post. It is in the interests of Fit2B Studio, LLC to provide thought provoking and authoritative articles regarding our fitness niche, but the opinions and beliefs stated in this article are those of the guest writer and may not reflect all the views and beliefs of the owners and founders of Fit2B Studio. Please direct any questions about this post to the author’s website. Thank you!
